Thursday, 21 June 2012

I Am Not A Number I Am A Free Man

I've been recently ploughing through Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter this, naturally led to me thinking about the subjects of freedom and humanity and what-not. After all it's difficult to read book that contains both the Great Emancipator and hellish devil-creatures that would like nothing more than to destroy the human race and not start to ponder those subjects. This train of thought collided with another one that was sparked off by the fact that yesterday Britain's druids... yes foreign readers we have druids... gathered at Stonehenge, the world's best henge in my opinion, to celebrate the Summer Solstice. The result of this idea tragedy... it was a train crash after all... was one simple thought. Fuck me am I glad I'm an atheist.

Either there is no god or he has terrible aim.

Odd thought I know but please allow me to explain. It's not really crucial for you to allow me this is a blog not a democracy, if anything I operate on a sort of benign feudalism. I was thinking about how I don't hate the druids or more accurately how I don't hate the Druidic faith. As an atheist... and I recently saw Slash play Sweet Child Of Mine, I bring it up because if that didn't make me believe in God nothing will... I feel a fair amount of disdain, disgust and disco fever (couldn't think of a third thing beginning with dis) towards all religions. However all religions are not created equal and I feel no real issues with certain groups. Buddhists for example are all kinds of laid back and groovy. Shintoists gave the world Sumo and for that alone get a bye. Druids are awesome as such I like them a lot.

When you're main religious festival looks like a
Led Zep concert your religion is all right by me

You see druids have a lot to recommend them over other faiths. Firstly they worship nature. I'd like you to go to the nearest window, have a look out of it and then come back. Sorry for the specifics but I don't want to leave my slower readers stuck standing by a window. Now even if you found a view more aggressively urban than Dr Dre you will still have seen some nature. That's pretty much a win for the druids. When you believe in and worship something that you can point to it gives you a good deal of credibility. Secondly the druids are all about being good to the environment and shit and that's like six kinds of awesome. If your beliefs can be directly linked to the concept of 'more bears' then you rock. Finally I really love the way that these mother-fuckers celebrate real shit. People have written fuck-loads about when the Jesosaur was born but the Summer Solstice is a factual event. Anyway whilst I was pondering this I basically decided that while all religions are equal, some are more equal than others. I then vaguely recalled something that Dr Richard Dawkins had once said about not taking a graduated approach to religion.

This man has received death threats for saying that magic is silly

That is why I love being an atheist. You see if you are a catholic, and I've chosen the cathols because I know exactly how there hierachy works (hint: its largely hat based), and the man in the pointiest hat says something it's true. It's called papal infallibility and it's in the bible. It basically means that God has the popes back. So if El Popo decides to declare that the sky is blancmange then God's all like... “Sure is little buddy” … and all caths need to accept the general dessert like nature of the sky. I however am free to say this.

“Whilst I agree with Dr Richard Dawkins on many issues, acknowledge his undoubted expertise in the field of evolutionary biology and of course accept that his role as a leading figure in the atheist community is well deserved I disagree with his view that all religions are equally in need of abolition.”

You see I am not a Dawkinite, nor am I a Darwinist or a follower of the Church of Hitchens. I am an atheist and my opinions are my own, free from interference and tyranny. I am free to assess every single thought a person seeks to articulate on it's own particular merit even, nay especially, if it's a person I largely agree with. The religious cannot say this. If the Church of England, a church founded entirely because someone wanted a divorce wants to say letting gays get married will destroy the sanctity of marriage their followers have to tow the party line. Muslims aren't allowed to go out a read a copy of the Satanic Verses no matter how good it may or may not be and Born Again Christians are forced to cruelly inhabit a universe where christian-rock is seen as a legitimate form of musical expression. I instead get the simple joy of knowing that I am always free to choose.

Free the slaves, murder vampires or both?

That is why being an atheist is frikkin' awesome because freedom of thought must always be the preference of the intellectually bold.
eddie <freedom isn't free>

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