Sunday, 23 October 2011

GCPD Blue

The following is a transcript of the interview of Marcus Denham arrested on suspicion of Grand Theft Auto, Grand Larceny and Murder 2. 


"March 31st, 4:30 in the A-M. Interviewee is one Marcus Denham. In the room are myself Detective Jacob Taylor and Detective Marlana Fisher. Let the record show that Mr Denham has waved the right to an attorney, but agreed to full cooperation with this investigation... You OK there Marcus."
"I'm fine."
"Sorry about the coffee, we tried to get hazard pay for it but... Anyway Mr Denham I'd like you to tell us about the events leading up to your arrest"
"Well it all started with Jimmy..."


""Banks," Jimmy had said "... are, by definition, the worst place to try and take money. Now, the best place to steal money is before it reaches the bank." This caught every-bodies attention.
"What? You want to stay outside and stick-up people as they walk in the joint?" Mickey had asked, Mickey was a good guy but he weren't paid for his smarts.
"No, you mook. I'm talking about the fresh money, the stuff that comes in from the other side." Here Jimmy had rolled out a map of the Docks on the table. "A lot of people don't know this but the Federal Government exchanges money with the banks." Here he pointed at one of the docks. "Once a month a big federal shipment comes in to supply all the banks in town."
"One big shipment of extremely traceable sequential bills" Billy chimed in.
"Not our problem. We're collecting the money for a third party." Jimmy said with the little smile he always used when he thought he was smarter than he was. 
"So we swoop in steal a couple a' hundred million from some tub crawling with Feds... in exchange for what? Some joker's everlasting gratitude?" Billy grumbled.
"First of all our employer ain't just some joker." Billy paused and smiled to himself. "Secondly our payment is the other half of the deal." Billy paused a moment to build the tension. "These are tough times and Uncle Sam is feeling the pinch and, in their infinite wisdom, have decided to cut back on funding for this particular operation. So the same boat that drops the money also collects the used notes the bank is swapping them for. Fresh money comes in old money goes out. Now these old notes are taken to a special facility and incinerated." He'd smiled then. "I know, I know it breaks my heart to. These guys are the real deal and the operation is pretty slick. They do the swap as soon as the boat is in so they can get back out to see where they are under the protection of the US Navy. Now usually they'd do this in the middle of the day. However on this occasion the storm that has been kicking the city's ass for the last week has held up the ship." Here Jimmy lent back and smiled.
"When's the boat arrive Jim?" I asked just to interrupt his moment of calm.
"Two hours?""

"Two hours later I was riding shot-gun in an eighteen wheel juggernaut, which had until recently been stuffed to the gills with used notes, gripping a city issue assault rifle and dressed as one of the city's finest as we rolled through the security checkpoint into the dock. All of the equipment had been supplied by Jimmy's mysterious third-party.
"Billy, you know that bag with the masks and shit?" I asked.
"What about it?" Billy grunted in reply trying to keep his shit together as we got closer to the waiting ship.
"Pass it here." Billy reach down beside him an threw the bag at me. I glanced inside grabbed one of the masks our benefactor had provided. "Fuck!"
"What?" Billy glanced over at me saw the clown mask I held in my hand. "Fuck! If we get out of this alive I'm going to fucking gut Jimmy.""

"The job itself had been almost two easy. Mickey and Jimmy had been in the empty container on the back of the truck and hitched a ride over to the boat. Whilst I slipped out the side and clambered up the crane. The guards who'd come to open the container on board got a short and nasty surprise. The first moment the crane operator new something was wrong was when he heard me open the door to his cabin gun in hand. Now Jimmy had told me to cap the crane guy, but I ain't into killing those that ain't trying to kill me so I gagged and tied him. I'd say we were about half way across town before  everything spiralled into the fuck jar"

"Billy had slammed on the breaks as soon as he'd felt the tires go... when we got out it turned out all of the tires had blown at once. So there we are four us standing in the middle of the street next to a truck filled with stolen money, wearing clown masks and holding assault rifles in one of the worst parts of town. 
"Look we've got our share, let's just ditch the truck and run" Mickey whined. In a second Billy had Mickey by his throat.
"Look you fucking moron we're wearing fucking clown masks. Do you know what that means! It means that the guy who wants this money won't just kill us if he doesn't get it. He's gonna get fucking creative. Clown masks Mickey! Who do you know who makes his goons wear fucking clown masks?" Billy dropped Mickey to the floor.
"Oh shit, Jimmy is what he's saying for reals?" Mickey whimpered at Jimmy who was already in the back of the truck.
"I've told you guys before only whack-jobs is hiring these days. It's work for the freaks or go hungry."
"What are you doing in there?" Billy shouted as Mickey pissed himself on the floor. In answer to this  two bags filled with the cash landed in the street.
"Grab the loot, leave the truck and let's get the fuck out of here." Billy was still stuffing bags. "Before shit gets worse" Billy's voice replied from inside the truck.
"Before shit gets worse? Worse? How can this shit get any worse" Mickey whimpered, as if in answer a shadow flitted across the moonlight "We're already working for the fucking Jo..." 
"Shut the fuck up!" I growled. I moved slowly to the back of the truck. "Psst Jimmy, we need to go. Now."
"We don't get this money for the boss-man we're worse than dead." Jimmy called back.
"We don't move now we're in trouble... I think he's here" Everyone froze.
"Bullshit!" Jimmy called back at me but Mickey and Billy were already at my back guns pointed to the rooftops.
"Fuck you Jimmy! We're gone" Called Mickey before plunging into the nearest alleyway as fast as his legs would carry him. I called for him to come back but Billy went after him. I cast one look back at Jimmy who was still stuffing bags with cash and took off after the other two."

"I'd barely gone twenty foot before I heard machine gun fire. Three maybe four shots. Then a muffled scream from behind me. Jimmy was out of the game. I caught up with Billy and Mickey just as they forced there way into some abandoned tenement building. Inside was almost black I could barely make out Billy and Mickey. Mickey went to say something but Billy gently covered his mouth and put a finger to his lips, without lowering the finger he pointed upwards. I remember even as we formed up back to back I knew it was already over. No-one ever gets away. I could barely see even after my eyes had adjusted to the darkness. Every shape could have been him and every noise or movement could be the one that let him find us. We slowly moved through the building sweeping each room."
"It was Mickey who spotted the fire escape n the second floor leading down the other side of the building to where we'd come in. Before either me or Billy could grab him, he'd made a dash for it, he was half way out of the window when he disappeared, a garbled scream cut short. I glanced at Billy or to where Billy had been to see the silhouette of a retreating figure flying up the stairs. I made a decision and ran down the stairs. I was back out the door in seconds pulling the mask off and throwing the gun away I hoped that I could blend back into the city proper. I heard a terrified scream and look up to see Billy cannoning towards me from the roof of the building flailing and screaming, blood pissing from his noise. Just before he hit me he stopped dead hung in the air for a second and flew back towards the heights still screaming. The screams only stopped after a sickening crack rang out of the darkness. I was frozen solid. It was only when my feet got wet that I realised I'd pissed myself. That's when the police arrived"


End of Transcript

Let the record show that Commissioner Gordon is recommending leniency in view of the Mr Denham's co-operation with this investigation. Further to consultation with the DA's Office it is the view of the commissioners office that this individual would be ideal for the new Wayne Foundation community rehab program. 

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